Ansley Growing Up

To Ansley,

You are now four months old! I can't believe it has been that long since they handed you to me in the hospital and I kissed your warm little cheek.

It has gone by in the blink of an eye, but so much has happened and you fill your daddy's and my life with so much joy.

You are a girl of many nicknames: I call you Sweet Pea, Darlin', and Sweetheart. To Daddy you are Love Bug or Punkin'. Grandpa Terry calls you "Ans". But to all of us, you are a sweet, precious girl that overflow our hearts with love and pride.

Right now you are fascinated with your feet and toes, and grab them at every opportunity. You have been rolling over from your back to your tummy, always to the right. Once you've rolled over, though, you don't have much patience. You want to get going, but don't know how to move just yet! You love to talk and grin, especially in the mornings! One of Daddy's and my favorite things to do is scoop you up in the mornings and put you between us in the bed. You giggle and smile and give us a great start to the day.

We sing and read to you all the time. Your favorite songs seem to be "Bananaphone", "She'll Be Comin' 'Round the Mountain", "If You're Happy and You Know It", and the "Itsy Bitsy Spider". Daddy also made up a special song about you standing up, and I will have to videotape it soon! You always smile when we sing it.

You also have learned to give "kisses". When someone asks for a kiss or "some sugar" (and you are in the mood!), you open your mouth wide and give a sweet, sloppy kiss. Sometimes you lick us, too! Violet is your buddy and you are fascinated by her.

Your four month check-up was last Friday, July 9th, and you were measured and checked over. Dr. Becknell says you are a very healthy, happy baby! You measured 26 inches (90th percentile for height), and 15 lb. 2 oz. (75th percentile for weight). You definitely are getting the height from daddy! You are so long, but still fit into some 0-3 month clothes and most of your 3-6 month clothes. Some are even a little big on you! You also started cereal (7/9), and although you were a little skeptical at first, you seem to like it now.

Above all, Mommy and Daddy love you with whole hearts, and are very excited to see you grow and learn new things. Your smile melts us, and when you talk to us, we feel blessed to hear what you have to say. You are a precious gift from the Lord, and I am so proud to be your Mommy.

All My Love

How I've Grown

Ansley, this is how you've grown over the past year!

12 Weeks - August 2009

20 Weeks - October 2009
27 Weeks - December 2009
39 Weeks - March 9, 2010
The Day Before You Arrived!
Newborn Ansley
March 18, 2009
One Month Old
April 2010
Two Months Old
May 2010
Three Months Old
June 2010
Four Months Old
July 2010

Road Trip!

On July 1, Ansley began her first road trip. My extended family live in Indiana and hadn't been able to get down to meet her yet, so I planned to drive up and spend some time with them. Kevin had to stay and take care of his mom who had a biopsy. So Ansley spent her first time on the road with Mommy and Grandma. We make this trip every Christmas, and draw it out for two days to make it a little more enjoyable. But because we only had a few days, our plan was to drive all the way through in one day. Sounds good, but neither of us really believed it would happen.

Ansley did AWESOME! We left at about 7:30, stopped for lunch at Chick-fil-A, and then once more for a stretch break at a rest stop. Other than about an hour and a half period in the car, she slept the ENTIRE TIME. Mom and I couldn't believe our luck! We arrived at my mom's parents at about 4:30 and started our family fun. Here are some pictures from our adventures:

Ansley & The Indiana Crusade

Well folks. Ansley is on her first road trip. After a whirlwind summer, we finally got to go see my relatives in Indy. Mom and I are the only ones who were able to go, and Ansley got to meet my family for the first time. Stories of our adventures coming soon!

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Welcome Back, Mama!

It's been quite a while since I posted. I've been busy loving on my daughter, and time has just flown by since I went back to work. Of course, I was only there for four weeks, and then school let out for summer. And now summer vacation is halfway over. I'm trying to make the most of the time I have with Ansley during these days, and it's going by so fast!

Meanwhile, while I've been AWOL, she's been doing a lot of new things. She reached three months, and rolled for the first time on that day, back to tummy! Of course, it took her a while to start rolling consistently, and her special Father's Day gift to Kevin was to start rolling up a storm. Now we can't lay her down without her rolling over in a matter of seconds! She also began staring at her hands and feet, figuring them out. This began probably at 10 weeks or so, but she does it much more often now. Ansley is also talking ALL the time and sharing her cute little laugh with us. She smiles and laughs when we sing to her, and her favorite song is "If You're Happy and You Know It". Kevin can't finish the song without her cooing and grinning! A few weeks ago, she also started wearing a few 3-6 month outfits, although she's still in most of her 0-3 months and size 1 diapers. Another Ansley favorite is taking a daily nap with Daddy. And it's no secret that Daddy likes it, too!

Super Mom Goes Down

Today was Ansley's 2 month checkup. I took a quarter of a day at school, after much begging and pleading of the husband, and met my mom at home. We were to ride there together, get her shots, and then head home. Nothing too traumatic.

I cried the first time she got a shot, so I thought maybe I'd be exempt this time. Nope. It still hurts. Ansley hardly ever cries, and it's usually very mild as crying goes. So when she cries out loud and in pain, it is awful! Heart-wrenchingly awful. I didn't try to fight the tears because I figured they are normal and just part of the whole mommy package. So when we left a few minutes later and Ansley was happily asleep, I thought it was over.

On our way home, we stopped by Target to get her prescription, because it was also announced that she has thrush. Yay! I felt for sure I would have known if she had had thrush or not, based on my vast newborn experience (not!) and the descriptions in my baby books. That makes you an expert, right? Well, it didn't appear anything like what I thought it would, and I felt totally dumb and totally guilty. She has had this white stuff on her tongue for over a month! But it wasn't curdy like I'd pictured, and no one said anything about it at the last checkup, so I figured it was just a normal, milk-loving baby tongue. How could she have had this yeast infection the whole time and me not know it? Getting over my annoyance with my own ignorance didn't take too long, and a Frappuccino made it pretty much disappear. On the way home with her prescription and a bottle of generic Tylenol, I felt pretty darn good about this whole parent thing. How hard can it be? I've been wiping her butt and taking names for a whole 8 weeks now. A few hours later, however, I was frantic. Ansley started fussing, and the fussing grew to whining. The whining turned to wailing and then to full-out screams that set me in a panic. Ignorance, welcome back! I was helpless when faced with this- you always think there is SOMETHING you can do to stop the crying, and when there is no magic answer, it is bewildering, humbling, and downright terrible. My baby was hurt and in pain and I couldn't do anything to soothe her. I couldn't believe how powerless and small it made me feel.

Kevin off at sports, I called him hysterically crying and told him how upset she was. Except MY upset caused him to hear nothing but crying and unintelligible garble. I was mad that he wasn't with me when I needed him. I needed someone to help, and he was coaching a lacrosse game. He was frustrated with my crying, telling me that I needed to calm down or I would only upset her more. Which doesn't calm me down, by the way. But, he is coaching to help supplement our income, so I can't blame him for not being there. Either way, his scolding just upset me more, and I had so many tears flowing down my cheeks it was hard to see straight. Finally, I pulled myself together long enough to give her the infant tylenol, and just hugged her little body. Even if she was going to cry until the medicine began to work, she needed to be held close and feel loved by mommy. And I needed the closeness to my baby, with the knowledge that I was trying everything I could to make her feel loved and safe. It seemed like a long time until the crying began to wane, but Ansley finally settled down. The next few hours brought little episodes of sharp cries and screams every few minutes, but sleep won over and I laid her in her lambie swing so her little chub legs wouldn't be jostled. Some of the longest moments of my life, for sure. The title of Super Mom is a long way off...

Workin' Mama

I went back to work yesterday. I began dreading it almost as soon as we brought Ansley home. Three days old and I was already worried about having to leave my baby. Talk about neurotic! And also totally normal. No mom wants to leave their child. But some moms can do it more easily than others: maybe they're ready to go back to work, maybe they're ready for adult interaction. I was neither. Definitely didn't want to do the 9 to 5 (or 7 to 4) instead of cuddling with my little girl. And good luck with adult interaction- I teach third graders all day! Sunday night, I was a total blubbering wreck and spent the better part of an hour sobbing in my husband's lap. Ansley was going to his aunt's house (who is closer to our age than our parents), and is completely loving and fun. Of course she would be taken care of. But not by me, her mom who knows how to do everything "just right". As much "just right" as eight weeks will teach you anyway! But I'm not fooling anyone. The real reason is that I just wanted to be with Ansley every minute. I was so upset that I would miss almost all of her day, and the little moments would be lost during the minutes I wasn't spending with her. I couldn't help but think of the missed smiles, coos, warm hugs, sweet eyes. They would be given to someone else besides mommy. It was killing me!

But Monday morning came, and even though I teared up a few times at the beginning, I had to muster my strength and get through the day. Kevin volunteered to drop Ansley off for me to make it easier, even though Melissa's house is past my work and he doesn't have to go anywhere near that side of the county. I'm convinced the day would have been much harder if I had taken her, so I'm so thankful he did that for me. Armed with my Caramel Macchiato, I stepped into my classroom for the first time in almost 8 weeks. And you know what? It wasn't as horrible as I was anticipating. There were some kids that got on my nerves (as always), and I definitely missed my girl, but I got back into the flow and the day went by quickly. And the very best part of going back to work was the excitement I felt when I left to pick her up. I grinned and laughed and sang happy songs to myself all the way there. It was ridiculous how happy I was to go and get my baby girl! When I scooped her up into my arms and gave her a warm, loving hug, everything felt alright. And it was.